Wednesday, August 11, 2004

How interesting.

Yes I'm back blogging.. AGAIN.. looks like that the boredom of my life has finally gotten to me... I love to work, shit, and I am serious. I need a girlfriend now, someone to love again, someone to care about, and someone who cares about me... Seriously, now I am throwing myself fulltime into my work, something that does not last forever, something that is so frivolous, so inconsequential. Why am I blogging?

I realised that the best thing that has happened to me is my break up with shar. Guess she was becoming my life, too much in fact. I hate control, as in I hate anyone trying to control me, and I can guess what I was becoming. Control freak. Army has taught me that much, letting someone go to do what they love is more satisfying than breaking someone to your will. Being a PC has taught me a lot.

I hope my men will come to regard me as their friend. It is a lonely life as a PC, above everyone else, ordering people around, shooting arrows like legolas. Whether I like the priviledges, the responsibility, the power, I cannot say. I guess I just love to be around people. But the funny thing is, I can make friends more easily with females. Sigh

ranting