Some say I'm melancholic. Maybe I am. I remember the little boy I used to be once. Who was in NAFA. I guess piano has always been a huge part of my life. When Mum used to send me to piano school, this old school building off Selegie road. We had to park in the sun. Saturdays were 大课 days, masterclasses almost every month, where you would perform the pieces you've been practising. I remember when my teacher gave me a good remark, me and mum, occassionally sis, after she joined NAFA, would go for supper at Lao Pa Sat. If the comment was especially bad, she would be angry with me, and I would dread those moments. Yes, my mum always had a temper, she would just hit me and scream in the car and drive like a mad woman. I remember I was scared. Almost all the time, after a bad masterclass, I would take the seat right behind the driver's seat, so that she would have a hard time pinching and hitting me in the car along the way. Sigh.. It's amazing how my piano has progressed even with such parental "guidence". I think I eventually grew to love it, even though I was always punished over the piano.
Temper. One more thing I've inherited from my mum. I have a legendary temper I guess. In primary school, one of the more interesting entries in my autograph book was that I was a nice guy, except when I lost my temper. Haha... Then when I was with Shar, I guess my temper kinda managed to dictate moments of happiness. Then again, I hope I've got it all under control now. Nowadays, when I get an outburst, it's rare, and it's usually over some really really important matter. But I digress...
I guess you will grow to love whatever you are good at. I remember I was trying to do a recording for an international piano competition. Brahms. Rhapsody, Op. 79 \ No. 2 . A rhapsody is a piece full of flair, of passion, of unbridled angst. I guess in trying to portray that, I made many mistakes in my recording, which lead to another recording, until I was doing my recording at 2 am in the fucking morning, with all doors and windows closed so as not to wake my neighbours up.
Speaking of which, my roommate just woke up. I think he's pissed at me typing away.
I guess I'll always be a guy who likes my space. I like obscurity, I like vagueness. The world is too complex to colour in shades of black and white, no matter what the graphic artists say. Greys are perfect on the canvas where morality, politics, money, greed all collide and come together. Sometimes, it's like a Beach Boy's song, where Kokomo's waiting around the corner. Other times, we snuff out Candles in the wind, and hope dies along with us.
I guess one quote which I like a lot is:
“I hear music when I’m with you,” Sylvia said, perhaps to herself.
“What kind of music?” Wes asked, just as softly.
“Continuous. Umm… sonatas, suites. A lot of Bach.”
“Major keys or minor?”
“Minor, mostly.”
“That doesn’t sound good.”
Sylvia embraced Wes around the arm. “It is,” she said as she smiled. "
You don't wanna know which website I got that from:). I guess I hear a lot of music when I'm alone. When I'm with someone, music flows. It used to be poppish songs: ala "One in a million", cheesy songs that worked somehow. Listening to her talk on the phone with the Perfect 10 playing on the background. I've grown up now. Now, my music is in the minor key, sad, modulating over areas of intense passion, happiness, stress, angst. You name it.
I think I'll catch the sunrise with my iPod. Nowadays, chinese songs are in. Don't ask me why. Then again, Vivaldi's Four Seasons has always been another favourite of mine. Angry winter has passed, and Spring is just arriving. Let's see if I can work myself into a Spring mood by the time I get to the Lake.
Tata. I'll take a mental picture to send it to you.
不想。
lip
ranting
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