GCE O levels

An interesting event occurred today whilst i was on the bus home at around 12 pm. okay, some of your may be thinking: what the hell? HE TAKES THE BUS? for you information, i do take the bus. infrequently. and others might ask: YOU GET OFF WORK AT 12pm? Yeah. I do. especially when i'm on leave and i have to get back to camp to get interviewed by my CO.

anyway, i was on the way back, taking SBS bus number 12 (single decked, unfortunately) when a group of JC 1 students boarded the bus and started to yack about their GCE 'O' level results.

"Aiyoh! I got 17 points. Wonder which poly i should go to?"

"Nanyang looks fun, but then Temasek Polytechnic closer to my house le."

"Eh, remember this bus stop, this is where we were at when we "pon-ned" school for the first time"

And so the rambling continued while i listened with one ear and my iPod shuffle stuck into the other ear. this JC in the far eastern side of singapore did indeed have a reasonable crop of students, ranging from DHS to Maris Stella and some other girl's school with a dark green skirt and sheer, threadbare tops, presumably to expose their latest bra design to the male population. i digress.

and lo and behold, a few stops later, another O level candidate boarded the bus. and proceeded to take out her testimonial from her bag, and passed it to her companion who plonked himself right beside me. *mutter* (he was fat somemore). and there it was, right on top:

RAFFLES GIRLS SCHOOL. Tada.

Premier institution in the central part of Singapore, garnering 12 out of 21 high scorers (1 of whom happens to be my sister's classmate). For the record, my alma mater only managed to secure 8 out of the 21 slots, with dunman high school securing that last coveted spot. ah, the perils of grades competition.

and dammit, my sister got 6 points, 1 better than me. *mutter*. But i got 1A2, 1B3 (for languages, no less) while she got 2 B3s! Yay! That's what i called sibling rivalry.

anyway, the RGS girl in question (She has a name, which happened to be platered right on top of her testimonial: we shall call her JT), happened to have quite a longish testimonial. (and no you creeps, i didn't read any of it.) The ruckus that the other group of students made suddenly was replaced with loud "shushes" and plenty of finger pointing at the testimonial being read by the big fat guy sitting next to me.

I bet they were thinking: "Wah RGS, must be damn smart". low whispers followed, and they were having a soft but unmistakable conversation about JT definitely. all this while, JT was sitting there demurely, looking at her nails, looking straight ahead, looking left, looking right.. but not looking at the other group of students.

haha. i caught intellectual elitism in action.

and so, after a few stops, a guy among the group managed to conjure up enough courage to ask: "eh RGS Girl, you how many points for the O levels ah?"

i half expected her to smugly reply "6 points la, but i got 1 A2, shit cannot get nice result card, and my teacher wrote that i was an exceptional student. NO NO NO! the word is BRILIANT! GENIUS!..." you get the idea.

"16 points".

or somewhere in that region. ah well.

you can be a big fish in a small pond, or a small fish in a big pond, or any fish in any sized pond, but then, at the end of the day, grades really don't matter. really. People matter the most.

so stop condemming geps. cos we suck as well. at least i know i do:)



lip
ranting

Which School Should I belong To AGAIN?

Singapore Chinese Girls' school


which secondary school (singapore) should you be in?
brought to you by Quizilla

This is hilarious. Omfg.

lip
ranting

Who reads this shit anyway?

ahhh... so i did get a reply. and frankly, i read it with a touch of massive emotion. did i do something wrong? ok maybe i did. maybe i didn't. maybe i really did screw myself and my whole image or whatever over. and frankly. i don't care. it's a blog dearies, a web-log online, open the world. welcome to the world, the real world. there are people polarized over issues; war, children, people. and there's nothing wrong having different views. maybe i appear to be vindictive, maybe i am egotistical, self-centred, prejudiced, jealous, gullible and i stick my nose into every smallish issue i find interesting. well, that's what people do, and i happen to just put it up for public scrutiny; screw me you don't like it.

anyway, it's your judgement, your call and your views. either be brave enough to flame me and come scream in my face, or shut up and talk behind my back. i raised my views, he raised his views, we're equal. and really barnabas, being egotistical and stuck up is one of my flaws, and i recognize that. and frankly, i did say that me being me was the big reason why i wasn't really successful socially. and really, no one is really accepted by everyone. i'm satisfied with my lot in life, are you?

barnabas's response here. Love ya too dude:)


lip
ranting

Yahoo Search

Hmmm I've had 2 link to my blog from yahoo searches. the first one was
justina lyrics (Yahoo)

and then the second one was
wong kok siew death (Yahoo).

Have fun with search engines, google your name, yahoo your enemies name. it's great fun:)

lip
ranting

Dummy's Guide to being an Infantry PC

I wished i had that advice in the comments when I was commissioned. I think it would have been helpful:)

Excerpt:

Dummy's Guide to being an infantry PC

1. dun bring us all 'hor-lund' when you topo. If you do, apologize instead of just asking us to move faster to cover up for YOUR error without us knowing you Hor-lunded until later when our section commanders tell us over joketime. its a tough job we know.

2. dun self-garang at the expense of the platoon. we know when to wayang and if no one is watching, your garang-ness does not impress us. we are normally too tired to bother.

.
.
.
.

7. Listen to the platoon sgt and or the section cmdrs when in doubt unless they are dicks too (ask us). This is VITAL to mission success if you happen to be an instructor during active time and end up as a PC of an ex-active battalion for reservist. we sorrow with you if you end up as a PC of a fighting platoon made up of ex cooks, clerks, drivers and MPs. for that we do not pretend to profess a known solution.

The rest is here.

Hopefully i did a good job as a PC. Dunno le. Well, can read about Kwang Yong and Chee Siew's army lives in my sidebar. Had fun working with them:) xie le, bravo platoon 3 39 SCE!


lip
ranting

Songs

I just finished uploading my songs:) It's damn good.

Here they are:
Justina
Justina (Chinese)
Dumb Waiter (Chinese)
Dumb Waiter (Sax)
Qi Chen

needs work
Last Home
My Jazz
Over The Rainbow

"Last Home" is by P.O.S.T, my previous band. Please post your comments on the songs yeah? We'll be doing more recordings, that means i'll need more server space on pacific net:) hehe.


lip
ranting

Love

Some excerpts from www.wholivesnearyou.com, Siglap Area

What Is Love?

That person has to "torture" you at night in your dreams, you have to worry abt that person is doing or who she is hanging out with 24-7, that person has to make you feels uneasy when you talk to her... These are just some of many signs of when you are REALLY in love with someone.

love is not based on the outer nor inner qualities of the person. It is just something magical and definately unexplainable. You cannot control who or when you fall in love, as it just happens naturally. Remember this: Only time will tell if your initial attraction for that person is true and until you are very sure that you have indeed understood your love more than even her own parents, do not assume that it is love.

afta all these crap.. tt was wad i used tO believe.. nOw?~ i dont believe in such things anymOre..

Love sucks.

-br0ken

another broken-hearted person in the world.

问世间情为何物，直教人生死相许
在天愿作比翼鸟，在地愿为连理枝
天长地久有时尽，此恨绵绵无绝期

-长恨歌

lip
ranting

Dumb Waiter Lyrics

Dumb Waiter
You're laughing, you're happy today
You're crying, you're slipping away
I watched all the stories play out on your face
as you sip your coffee i serve at my place

i know not all that you say can be true
i know i'm feeling much more than you do

and i hear your heels come down the hallway
and i grab the coffee cups and ashtray
because i know you want a conversation with me
just with me

so tell me all the things you wanted to say
to hear me telling you that you're doing okay
so you come and laugh and cry and die
just with me

you're laughing, he's with you today
you're crying, again he's away
i watch the stories play out on your face
as you and him drop by to eat at my place

i see the rouge put back onto your lips
i can't imagine his hands on your hips

and i hear your heels come down the hallway
and i guess it's just another day
and i'm wondering if you're being fair
fair to me, not to me

but i guess i'm just another waiter
who is good at making friendly banter
so i'm better off staying home watching tv
though i hope you come along and watch some tv

doo... doo... doo...


had a bad day today. MID car crashed into a tree, broke windscreen, to cover up, paid $180 for wind screen, shared among officer, specialist and driver. damn

and i think the song above really reflects me. sometimes


lip
ranting

to all lawyers

hope you don't get stuff like this in court

Dumb Things Said in Court

To quote some of my favs:

Q: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his
sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?

Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female

more at the link above. it is damn hilarious:)


lip
ranting

Gep pics

omfg. ugle people tend to be smart. or smart people tend to be ugly.

sheesh. then i rather be a dumb jock.

GEP 2004 reunion dinner photos. thanks to jared's blog.

I really think i am a control gep. haha. cos i'm good looking. sheesh. now i have the hanting disease. god save me.


lip
ranting

Pics

EOCC picture


Memories


Dumb Waiter. For teh song

teachers and mentors

i went back to nafa on saturday. the place really struck me as to how big it was. as it, there were 3 campuses and me and wz had a hard time finding which one housed the school of young talents.

anyway, we arrived at 7:10, hoping to catch mdm fang before she had her masterclass. no such luck. her office was closed and we couldn't see her. so next best thing: attend masterclass.

bad mistake:). it was a happy occasion anyway, to meet my piano teacher again after such a long time. i'm happy that the arts scene in singapore is finally picking up, what with the 2 yamaha grands in her studio alone, with secretary and everything. glad to see that her old electric kettle used to boil water is still there:).

and of course, reminiscing the old times, in washington, in europe @ menuhin. Ah those were fun times.

for a quick stocktake: here's the rest of the gang:
Cheng Yu: medicine NUS
Qing Yong: medicine NUS
Weizhen: Arts NUS
florrine: A levels RJC J3
mingjing: A levels RJC J3
Diane: Full time music: New York
Jinghong: Full time music: Piano teacher? NAFA.
Rodney: medicine NUS
Keegan: go far, he can.

and the rest, well i don't know:) fill me up will ya? i think Yiling is with some other professor liao. all got their LRSM or some high level diploma paper, except for me:) well, at least i'm doing music production and composition. will be fun i guess.

good luck to all. and thanks mdm fang.


lip
ranting

Sex Etc.

http://www.sxetc.org

i actually found the site interesting. here's to love. and to everything in between. hope you don't get hurt.

lip
ranting

The Budget

Budget for 2005 is coming out soon. These things interest a small minority, coffeeshop talk, talk over a drink, or in our case, small talk about cigarette prices in a cinema seat prior to Million Dollar Baby and after A Very Long Engagement (in french with English subtitles)

and i realised my capital letters are back. bad bad. i shall abhor capital letters. it's a style thing.

anyway, i went out with jesse, alex and jr last night, after a dinner with my dad's friends. all sji old boys, from the class of mah bow tan, george yeo era. and of course, wong kok siew, my chairman from ies who just kicked the bucket. seems like you can't outrun death. but kudos to his life, for people rememeber the deeds done while alive.

and i digress. dinner was a very polite affair, from my point of view, with the old boys being rowdy, digging up snippets from their 50 years of living or so. everyone is successful in their own way, be it uncle mike, the KFC manager (and his car buying for his sons; must remind my dad), or uncle leong, the financial industry guy. and frankly, i can't remember much of their sons, who are all around my age, in NS or just out of it. and there was the lawyer, who defended anthony ler and now also the car-boot killers (i dunno the details). all hugely successful.

i wonder 30 years down the road, will me and my friends be the same, playing mahjong on friday nights, going out for drinks and really just having a blast of a time again. seems like at that age, your best friends have to be guys, or your wives will complain:). ah well, let's not muse so much.

and the budget is out. seems like it's going to be a budget surplus again. after 3 years of deficits. and frankly, i wonder which other country does the first couple have control over singapore's political, financial and business direction. i think it's only in singapore.

and sorry if i canceled for a dumb reason. i shall stay far far away from now on. it's weird. after the debacle and everything.


lip
ranting

Musings...

From mrbrown.com

Excerpt:

Dear Mummy,

I am feeling very sad.

Today in school, Zhong Guoren — my classmate from China — beat me again, in a maths test. That boy is an unstoppable genius machine.

Last week, he beat me in sports too.

If he were not here, I would have come in first and gotten a gold. But because the Government says we must welcome foreign talents to increase our population and to improve our economy, I got a bronze instead. This sucks.

Ahh the perils of competition and global knowledge. and of course, there are thousands of Zhong Guorens out then, wait, BILLIONS in fact. and frankly, there's nothing we can do about it.

we can: take the the protectionist stand, and then die from it. Like the right-wing movement in Europe nowadays. Or we can challenge ourselves and fight to the death.

ahhhh.. a sea of bloody competition. or go create a niche for yourself. you ain't alone in the world anymore Singaporeans. Your economy is global, your outlook is global, you will have to work as hard as your ass can take it.

and i laugh at the premiership wanting to limit foreign players. what a clear cut case of protectionism in action.


lip
ranting

Dumb Waiter

This is the very best we ever did. It sounds professional:). And it's good

Dumb Waiter

and the saxophone version of it
Dumb Waiter (Sax)

Go download and listen to it. It's freaking good.

lip
ranting

My Car.. I wished

Photos

My Hello is finally up, after configuring my firewall to allow it to access. Bah I hate computer stuff, anyway, more pictures. haha.


my iPod Shuffle


More Shuffle


Me!

Will attempt to figure out filmstrips and thumbnails now. Or if anyone wants to tell me, ah well:)


lip
ranting

Questions etc.

Had an interesting morning today, did a questionaire, which I thought was very good. So i shall post it up. Any comments, please just add them to my comments list. Hopefully, huiwen would have more views so she can finish her work:)

Thanks to huiwen for the thought provoking questionaire:

Many Singaporeans think of Singapore as pragmatic, materialistic, and so on. But, after the tsunami response, do you think that there's another, more positive, side to Singapore?

I think there has always been a positive side to Singaporeans in general, be it the cab driver who helps open the door, the guy at the bus stop giving directions, the gal on the street who returns a wallet. But most Singaporeans are generally of the “mind-your-own-business” kind. Even in New York/London etc. people tend to mind their own business more, mainly because the place is so densely populated and there is a lack of community feeling unlike small suburbs and towns.

So answer is: Yes.

Has the humanitarian effort been good for our "nation-building"?

Definitely. Nation building in terms of social responsibility, psychological defence and a good way to show the nation that the SAF can actually DO something (esp. engineers). 

Do you think the Singapore media has overemphasized Singapore’s efforts instead of focusing on the disaster itself? {the media used as a tool for inculcating national pride?}

My feel is that the media itself is given TOO MUCH of a role in the coverage of the tsunami. I have friends on the ground at Aceh, in fact I volunteered to go. But from reports there, when Kofi Annan, or some diplomat arrives, all humanitarian needs stop. And the VIP is given the free play to roam around with like an entourage of 2 million security people. Come On. It’s a humanitarian effort for goodness sake. Let the people on the ground do their work.

Plus media itself is given priority when deciding plane schedules and helicopter flights (quoting a Colonel from the SAF). Although information is priority at that point in time, you must remember that Singapore is down there to assist firstly, and then to report secondly.

My 2 cents.

Do you think the aid offered by our country is sufficient, too little or too much? And why?
(FYI: S’pore pledged conntribution of 15 million US dollars; relief operation involves more than 1200 military and civil defence personnel - of whom 900 are in Aceh, Indonesia. The humanitarian assistance provided by its military, medical and rescue teams is estimated to cost SGD 20m.)

No. It is the country with the most aid in terms of assistance. Again, I must point out the myth that is “aid” to countries. Most of the aid is just PLEDGED aid. i.e. US pledges and receives at a later point. Sometimes the aid money doesn’t arrive at all (as stated in media about some country. Can’t remember which one). And sometimes, the aid is just in the form of low interest loans that take ages to repay (and act as a asset to the nation itself). When you study economics and such, take note that countries such as US are in MASSIVE BOP deficits, debtor nations that can pledge 650 million dollars? Where are they going to get the money from?

And in Singapore context, we were the first ones in Melauboh. Remember that it is not money that counts, it is the help actually reaching the people in Indonesia, the work done, the facilities built, the comfort offered to a fellow human being; in short, the intangibles. These are the things that truly matter in human relationships.

And frankly, humanitarian aid always gets routed into the hands of bureaucrats and aid agencies who spend the money to entertain Kofi Annan when he arrives. Of every dollar of aid given, not everything gets to the people in need. In fact, only a small miniscule percentage arrives in the form of aid. And don’t get me started on aid in kind (clothes, bags, amenities etc.) Sometimes, these even end up in the tourist markets! Being sold off as tourist paraphernalia in the cities (yes, it’s true) read Jim Rogers’s Adventure Capitalist for more information and the evidence.

Do you have any worries about donor fatique?

No. I don’t donate. I prefer to let actions do the talking. And Singaporeans in general are generous, simply because we are rich. You have to be rich to even have enough money to donate.

How about concerns regarding corruption, mishandling of donations?

See above.

Last/ additional thoughts about this issue??

Nil. Tsunami was a great tragedy, but we must not forget the other tragedies in the world. It is easy for the US, for me to say, “ok, we have a tragedy now. Let’s donate $5/$500 million dollars.” Other ongoing tragedies are Iraq, Israel VS Palestine, Aids in Africa, Corruption in Russia, Muslim extremism in neighbouring countries, Cancer in affluent societies (due to overeating, conspicuous consumption of cigarettes, fatty foods.) The problem with the world is not the lack of money and food. It is a the lack of an equitable distribution of money, food and resources.

And of course, it is very easy to just talk about it

Interesting isn't it? You can comment too, maybe it'll have an impact. Or at least, have a differing view will ya? Don't be an apathetic Singaporean, we have too many of them around.

On another note, that was a nice V-day gift from B to J:). (I went on friendster dope). And i shudder to think what B was doing when he was photographed wearing his pants. haha. well, you just have to prove the critics wrong bruddah, and frankly, it is cool (kinda). Best of luck to you 2:)



lip
ranting

Music and stuff

my band did some music today. quite good.

Justina in chinese and with lyrics. the english lyrics sound much much better imho.

Qi Chen.
chinese thingy. with lousy drums, because shar doesn't want to loan me her cousins' electronic drum thingy.

Dumb Waiter
a jazzy/swing number. piano and voice.

Thanks to Kuek (for lyrics), Jon Lau (on piano), Ben Cheah (Guitar) and Elliot (Bass). Please help us make better music by donating:) and if any one requires a band for gigs, please inform me. we'll be more than happy to oblige.

we're the leftovers:). i'll be putting this up on my sidebar too.


lip
ranting

I GOT MY iPOD SHUFFLE!

WHEE!!!

I AM SO HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY! haha.

as with any new purchase nowadays, here are the... PHOTOS! haha





and some other photos as well...







for full photos, go here

lip
ranting

buggeration

my entire system just crashed on me. seems like my ADSL loader got caught up in some endless loop while trying to update my blog. my internet didn't work for like 1 hour until i reinstalled the entire driver and ADSL device. dumb prolink modem. think it's time to upgrade to wireless, once i get my laptop:)

and damn, lost my funny msn conversation with shar just now. let's see if i can find it. ah well. it's lost, and since my message history mode is kinda screwy, well it's gone for good:).

added a lot of people over the last couple of days on MSN. been updating my contact lists as well:) i use bebo instead of the plaxos and ringos out there. why are the services so diverse and are direct alternatives? maybe should just use one. bebo it is. everyone follow me. i don't care:) haha.


iPod shuffle coming in this afternoon. so excited. finally can go for marathon with a smallish stylish running mate. heh. i bought the arm band as well, as i intend to keep fit. after watching supersize me *shudder*, it's time to start exercising and stop drinking.

ya right. as though as that will ever happen:)


lip
ranting

what can i say?

well, i feel dumb. from an earlier entry.

ENFPs sometimes can be blindsided by their secondary Feeling function. Hasty decisions based on deeply felt values may boil over with unpredictable results. More than one ENFP has abruptly quit a job in such a moment.

must control Feeling function. really. i never felt the urge to throttle someone with my hands before. it feels good. and really, that was too far. i can see why stars hate getting punk'd. ah well. it was funny too i guess.

lip
ranting

pranks

well. just got punk'd. nice one weilan. really nice one.

well, someone nearly got killed and i just lost all my credibility. i should just dig my own grave.

and really, i believe barnabas is capable of such despicable shit. and that really showed my disgust of him. and my utter disdain of him. too bad it was misplaced. well, next time IA comes, he'll be dead:)

seriously.

i'm so pissed right now i'm going to get drunk on vodka. fuck all of you. fuck you clarence. fuck all the fucking lovers in the fucking world. fuck the toto draw for not giving me my 11 million. fuck all the moralistic crap they taught us since young. fuck it. i'm just going to fuck around now. fucking hell.

and fuck you barnabas.

lip
ranting

Blog Surfing

Went blog surfing again. and i found this!

You Are 23 Years Old

23 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

ahhh.. i act 23. older than i am. sheesh. i wished i acted like 30 or something:) at least i'm mature for my age! i hope. heh. oh and was watching wu zhong xian yesterday (the guy without the centre parting) ok ok... and guess what? there was a topic on "mature-men killing teenage girls" (sorry, best translation i could do). ermm.. to be more specific, teenage girls whose looks are lusted (ok admired) by mature men. essentially, they had to be nubile, nice body, a little naive (cos mature men long for their teenage years apparantly) and very very high energy level. guess they'll just do all the talking. and the guy can shut up. good.

anyway, happy valentines day, for all of you caught up in this commercial conspiracy. well, maybe in the next few years i can start celebrating valentines day again. overseas this time. can't wait to go, to leave everything behind and start afresh, much like JC and to some extent, army life. well, the only constant is change. the cheese constantly moves. and people constantly change. just my 2 cents.

lip
ranting

Justina

i just got my ass off into working, and came up with the "soft" version of Justina. Here it is.

Justina.mp3

For those who like free music, that's my somewhat anyhow do effort:), so go download it, just don't plagarize. Lyrics are by Jon Lau, Kuek (i think), and the overal inspiration from my band. heh. we rawk!

Also here are others that I've done over the years, just rough ones that i did when playing with my triton. hopefully, i'll get a mic up, then i can sing (DO I SENSE THE TERROR IN SOME OF YOU:)? haha.

ok ok

Over The Rainbow (Instrumental)
My Jazz (Some lousy rendition 2 years ago)

When i have time, i'll upload the videos, the music and all the shit in my portfolio. meanwhile, i need to find a new server for my stuff, getting too big to put on Pacnet:). Even though it does offer 20MB...

lip
ranting

The Economist

Now i know why the hell i find the economist so interesting:)

But The Economist, apparently, had more frontal nudity in its photographs than all the other magazines combined.

Thanks to http://ridingsun.blogspot.com

Full article here.

Also check out this website

lip
ranting

Random Thoughts

Ahhh... so many things happened today. quite fun actually. i bought toto with the guys, ($35, first time i bet so much), then had lunch, had audition with the band (hopefully, we'll get the freedom gig, and also the riverside slot, or wala. or wadever. i don't really care.) and also huiwen's birthday party which was ALMOST like a wedding dinner.

heh. anyway. hopefully, we'll win some money from the toto. $11 million hongbao draw le. that's about a million each. IF WE WIN. heh. not putting my hopes too high, but joses can date maria sooner than we win the million. ooops:)

well, i think i shall post the lyrics of our original songs up. i guess it's full of meaning. and really, melancholy strikes at the worst moments. reading the lyrics is like living a life all over again. oh well.

I know you’re feeling lonely

Been living a life facilitating
Been living a life without
Wondering why my heart is aching
Wanting to scream and shout

Too much love in me for taking
With no one to take it out
The Loneliness is true love’s shaping
There never was a doubt

Chorus:
I know you’re feeling lonely
Hold me the darkness come this way
I know you’re feeling lonely
Hold me don’t let it come to stay
I know you’re feeling lonely
Hope not true love conquers all
Hope not true love conquers all

There never was a silver lining
Behind the bleakened cloud
There always was a problem finding
Humanity in the crowd

Too much love in me for taking
With no one to take it out
The Loneliness is true love’s shaping
There never was a doubt

Chorus:
I know you’re feeling lonely
Hold me don’t ever go away
I know you’re feeling lonely
Hold me I need you every day.
I know you’re feeling lonely
Hold me don't ever ever ever... (repeat)

That's lonely. i guess that's all of us, when we are lost, when we yearn for someone to share our life with. and it's really quite a nice song. one day when we record the song, and it's perfected, i'll post it up.

well next song is Justina. This was written for the RJC counselor who killed herself. I guess it's a little tribute to her. why take your life just because you can't cope with studies? really. it's sad who she leaves behind: family, friends, loved ones...

Escape(for Justina)

It seems its over now
Your time so short it passes through like
Morning on the trees

You wash your hands clean of this world
A Dead queen leaves its nest
Your innocence and joy was never meant to be here.

Don’t know who called you back.
You shouted no one answered did they take you for a fool.
It wasn’t that we didn’t care
The phone was just away.
It’s not like at that point in time they’d known what to say.

(Chorus)
Falling down. You didn’t hit the ground you stopped to fly away.
Left this place but smiled at me just yesterday.
Made me feel much lighter here,
Don’t know why I didn’t know your name

Sad sad song. How many people we didn't know and didn't make the effort to get to know just passed us by?

sigh. now i really should get to know that chio bu denise from huiwen's party. and alex. haha. oh well. dreams dreams dreams. but everyone has the right to dream. Like in neverland...

Neverland

Verse 1:
Sing a song of sixpence
about a pocket full of rye
and the four and twenty blackbirds
that you baked in the life of pi

Saying how this could ever be
How you could never see that
It was going to be that way

Verse 2:
Sorry’s not the word to use
For the past trespasses gone astray
The young will never know and we’ll forgive ourselves someday

But somehow guilt just eats away
Obscurity seems not so bad
And somehow it comes to mind

Chorus:
Yeah in never never land, you’re gonna find that
you’re always gonna be in the backdrop
Yeah, in never never land, you slowly slip away

Peter pan’s a fool and though you know it’s true
Cos he’s only gonna kill your tomorrow,
Yeah in never never land you’ll lose the past today.

Verse 3:
As the sorry days go by
The silly tears that we think we cry
Our Wendy’s gone insane
Drugs and smokes have rocked her brain

It’s like how this would never be
When you saw it all so long ago
And mama’s just going to brood

Verse 4:
Now I guess the pain you’ve borne
Just weighs you down like a pile of stones
Solutions always failed
Except the consequences they entailed

So how do you deal with that
You’re lonely and someone’s out to get you
so what are you going to do

Bridge:
Hey now it seems you’re just a fool to be alive
Now you know that she is gone

Ahhh.. nice song about neverland. and really, it was inspired by the neverland movie. thanks to jon, ben, kuek and elliot. the Leftovers. Dudes, we rock! and not forgeting P.O.S.T (pieces of shits), comprising alvin, junyang, james and zhaoling. had a lot of fun at SOLACE man. we should do it again.

So many things to blog about. lastly, huiwen's 21st birthday. well happy birthday gal! older than me siah. must call da jie. next time can give ang pow to me liao. hehe. and finally got to see shauna. like never ever seen her before, though i sort of known her since like sec 3? thanks to MUD and jesse. hehe. and that age group is going to be my classmates in university this year. what a small world indeed.

and barn went too. great. but ah well, i was well and throughly high thanks to the vodka in my drink. (courtesy of huiwen). and poor me was left alone. remind me when i hold my 21st birthday to invite groups of people, not poor individuals. heh. that episode caused me to drive 120km/h along yio chu kang road. a very thrilling experience. especially when i had to jam brake twice to avoid speeding past the dumb red light camera-ed traffic light junctions. ah well. went vie bar to drink somemore. heh. and watched liverpool lose to birmingham. they suck now man. thanks hor shar, take taxi home, never ask me to fetch, if not i sure tommorrow die liao. heh.

going off topic. very off track liao. anyway, thanks florrine, i think i'll visit fang lao shi soon. have to. haven't seen her for a long time liao. hope she's fine and all. maybe ask weizhen and cheng yu down too. well, time to visit my teacher who has taught me a lot. about piano, and above all, about morals and life in general. happy new year to you, mdm fang.

lip
ranting

ex-bfs

weng's party last night was not too bad. quite good actually, to meet up with the class again. well, her fears of there not being enough food were ultimately unfounded, judging from the massive amounts if leftovers after the dinner.

had a lot of drinks, vodka, whisky, coke. got a little high, and maria actually told me i look good! haha. guess she must be pissed drunk. which of course, was shot down by the rest of the gang immediately. sigh. why do good looking guys aways get the short end of the stick :D and jenny was quiet; sorry didn't get the chance to talk to you:)

anyway, shar went too. and frankly, i guess there was a certain tension in the air. can't really be relaxed around my friends i guess. and conversation seems really awkward. well, i guess she doesn't really mean much anymore. plus i'm damn pissed off that i didn't get an ang pow when i went to pick her up. haha.

well, barn got thrown out of his house for new year. and he's staying with clarence. hmmmm. sometimes i really just wish to fly away right now and start anew in the US. at least there's no baggage to carry around. this society is really really too small to make things awkward enough. well, hope that someone somewhere is praying for him (for those who believe in this). my faith has changed from orthodox to somewhat karmaistic and zen like. haha. how apt of my life.

interestingly, i had an msn conversation this morn wif a certain ex of a certain friend. i wonder if i was like that in 2003. i guess not. i tend to keep to myself during eocc. really shittily unfriendly. oh well. i guess people deal with breakups differently. i think i bowed out in a dignified manner. no bounce, no flings, just hard partying and clubbing for awhile:). ah well. i'm not perfect. no one is.

well, valentines day is coming soon. hehe. just 2 days away actually. and i'm all alone. all those singles, care for a KTV break come monday:)? to sing away the blues and whine away? heh. well, i read somewhere: marry the one who loves you more than you love him/her. at least you won't get hurt that way. cynical, but very true.

lip
ranting

overnight mahjong, uncles and others

i am very sad.

i was called uncle by my very own cousin! granted, she's 7 years old, i'm 20, but still, i'm of "uncle" age to her liao. so sad. guess i'm really really getting old. oh well. if you all ever call me uncle, i'll cut off your tongue.

anyway, maybe i just look mature. and handsome. haha. that's why uncle. some coffeeshop aunties, wah kaoz, call me Ah-Boy. at least not uncle, if not i really need to go for hair dye-ing and jazz up my image liao. maybe pierce a nose piercing or something.

on another note, my uncle's getting married! seems like chinese new year, someone is always getting married, or in the case of my family, divorced. so far i've seen 2 different uncles married (or is it?) to the same auntie. wah. and the 2nd one's korean. sis will be soo happy. nowadays very hip and cool to get divorced you know. but then, think about the children. i guess they will grow up a lil disfunctional. just like someone i know.

later in the day, i have to go teach rachel (that's my piano student) and then proceed on to weng's house for gathering. guest list: the guys, the 5 "bitches", the rest and the old ones like chong han, serene and shar. ah. it'll be a little weird i guess. right:)? well let's see, or maybe i'll just play mahjong all night long. and go club after that. long time never club liao. i think i really grow old liao.

sigh. valentine's day is coming up next monday. well, seeing lovey dovey couples on the road just wants to make me bash their faces in. haha. remember last year, i was with the guys, and we were singing "shi nian" by eason chen. that time it held so much meaning for me. it still does. time flies by really fast, and people change their personality and their characters as time goes along. it's really hard to find someone to last a lifetime, not that it's very popular nowadays. where is the love yo? or rather, where is the commitment?

maybe we should hold divorce ceremonies. like wedding ceremonies. except it'd be held in like a mortuary. and people will scream and shout. and the rabbi/priest/justice of the peace will say: "dearly bereaved, we are here today to witness the breakdown of (insert name) and (insert name)'s marriage." and thereafter there'll be lots of pots and delicate china for both parties to fling at each other. and then that'll be that. after which they'll treat each other civil for goodness sakes. it's a small world, you will still meet up. congrats.

that was moronic.

on a sidenote, i lost a grand total of SGD $0.70 last night over 5 hours of mahjong. a new record i must say. for i have never lost on home ground before. maybe my luck is changing this coming cock year. or rooster whatever tickles your fancy.


uncles, aunties, my extended family is so confusingly large it's mindboggling. ah well. oh maria's just got home at 9:48am. congrats. that means alex can drive after one night w/o sleep. that's amazing. i am so going to conk out on my keyboard.

good night all. sweet dreams.

lip
ranting

et cetera

being chinese new year's eve, i have to stay up late to keep my parents alive for a longer period of time, and in so doing, up my monthly upkeep payments in their old age.

how pessimistic. but really, parents are your the first people you ever get to know well, and they love you so much. even to the point of being at fault. sometimes, most people never learn how to treasure their parents, and never appreciate them. some people i know lament at their parent's "protectiveness", longing for freedom. others are more materialistic, relying on their parents for money.

i believe these are all just loose talk, for everyone, deep down, will still really respect their parents. why then, are there abandoned old folks at homes? why are there disputes over wills, inheritances and property? perhaps we really need to reexamine ourselves, and note that our parents are still the most important people in our lives. ever.

i write this because of the need to for families in society today. 50% of USA children come from single parent homes; in singapore, the percentage is more 2/5 of all families are divorced/single parent. sometimes i wonder among my friends, who would end up in this state? i really do not know. children in single parent families have the tendency to end up as single parents themselves. perhaps it's society today, with a gravitation towards self fulfilment and selfish thoughts. that's our society that my generation inherits.

take my family. on the surface, everything is fine. but i remember back in sec 4, i was a total rebel. in fact, my mum went overseas to study because she couldn't stand my nonsense anymore. thank god she was fine with september 11th happened. i think i'll never forgive myself if she was at WTC 4 years ago.


my uncle is estranged from my grandparents; precisely, it's his wife, my aunt who has in-law problems. well, i haven't seen them in years, and i only see them once a year, during chinese new year. same to all the extended family. i have 2 divorced aunts, 1 unmarried aunt, 2 single parents all in the family. how nice. and how sad for the children, who have to live with the stigma and the hurt for all their lives. i can attest to that, for i know the pain of those who live in silence and in hurt.

perhaps duty to oneself is more important to this generation than duty to society and family. some people mask their feelings behind a veneer of happiness and irrelevancy.

(sidenote: it's Chinese New Year. On the dot. Happy New Year.)

happiness: faked? most people can't tell, unless they are emotionally tuned to that person's feelings and are genuinely interested in people in general. that veneer of faked feelings can easily be breached, i feel. well, i'm an ENFP. Extroverted, Intuitive, Feeling and Perceiving.

ENFPs are friendly folks. Most are really enjoyable people. Some of the most soft-hearted people are ENFPs.

ENFPs have what some call a "silly switch." They can be intellectual, serious, all business for a while, but whenever they get the chance, they flip that switch and become CAPTAIN WILDCHILD, the scourge of the swimming pool, ticklers par excellence. Som etimes they may even appear intoxicated when the "switch" is flipped.

One study has shown that ENFPs are significantly overrepresented in psychodrama. Most have a natural propensity for role-playing and acting.

ENFPs like to tell funny stories, especially about their friends. This penchant may be why many are attracted to journalism. I kid one of my ENFP friends that if I want the sixth fleet to know something, I'll just tell him.

ENFPs are global learners. Close enough is satisfactory to the ENFP, which may unnerve more precise thinking types, especially with such things as piano practice ("three quarter notes or four ... what's the difference?") Amazingly, some ENFPs are adept at exacting disciplines such as mathematics.

Friends are what life is about to ENFPs, moreso even than the other NFs. They hold up their end of the relationship, sometimes being victimized by less caring individuals. ENFPs are energized by being around people. Some have real difficulty being alone , especially on a regular basis.

One ENFP colleague, a social worker, had such tremendous interpersonal skills that she put her interviewers at ease during her own job interview. She had the ability to make strangers feel like old friends.

ENFPs sometimes can be blindsided by their secondary Feeling function. Hasty decisions based on deeply felt values may boil over with unpredictable results. More than one ENFP has abruptly quit a job in such a moment.

complete link here

that's me alright. i am a "close enough" learning, never perfect, very friendly to most people (unless i hate you a lot) (see my below post for more information), and intuitive. some people say i am a busybody. oh well, everyone has their own right to think. and i reserve my right about myself. i lived my life with my principles and my morals. well, i love people alright, and i guess i suffer from the extrovert symptom: every thinks i'm out with someone and thus they don't ask me out. how sad. and i stay home:) hehe. *hint hint all*

anyway, enought of such musings. i shall carry on my deep and unconnected thoughts at a later date. on a lighter note: happy new year to all. good luck in the year of the chicken!

P.S. don't share hotmail passwords. trust me. i know.
P.P.S i wanna watch constantine. anyone up for it?

lip
ranting

Chinese New Year

That time of the year again. For Chinese, it's the new year, Spring Break and start of another lunar year. For the rest of Singapore, it's a time to relax, do army duties and drive taxis and rest at home.

well, will update on all the couzzie photos and uncle and aunties. hopefully, this year would be a better year for me. Rats are said to be lucky in romance and a lot of other things this year:)

Chicken Run!

lip
ranting

Nerds

was bored today, so i went blog surfing:) and stumbled along this nerdiness test:)

YAY! I AM NORMAL! haha




Go and take and and post your results. Damn fun:)

lip
ranting

Sunday Morning

Duty on Sunday morning. Sigh. At least I'll have CNY off. Look on the bright side man, only 41 days left.

Everyone is complicated. Everyone has complications. To share that with someone, and to have someone share theirs with you, well, that's bliss. till then.

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on Sunday morning
And I never want to leave

lip
ranting

Duty

blardy hell; doing saturday AND sunday duty.

Tmd. Tradeoff? No duty for CNY at least. Goody goody.

So no posts this weekend. sadly. 39 has so much duty it's crazy. Even ORD personnel have to do. what to do? that's life. you win some you lose some.

lip
ranting

Rants

thanks to mrbrown.com

DragonflyBlade21: A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.

i feel like that from time to time.

lip
ranting

War

Innocents of war are always children.
I wonder if i would have the moral courage to fire when called to do so if required.
and if i request that of my men, it would have to be for a damn good reason

BBC Pictures in Iraq

it's sad. really

lip
ranting

Libras

I am a Libra.
(Also known as "Scales")
My Horroscope starts like this:
" You have to be a real loser to be born a Libra. Libras are born with two left hands, both of which grow out of their ass. They are tone-deaf and generally have poor eyesight. The senses of self-esteem and humor are in embryotic states at best. " (Read more | Find yours)

awww... how sad
ranting

追

追

作词：林夕　作曲：李迪文　

这一生　也在进取这分钟　却挂念谁
我会说　是唯独你不可失去
好风光　似幻似虚　谁明人生乐趣
我会说　为情为爱　仍然是对

谁比你重要　成功了败了也完全无重要
谁比你重要　狂风与暴雨都因你燃烧

一追再追　只想追赶生命里一分一秒
原来多么可笑　你是真正目标
一追再追　追踪一些生活最基本需要
原来早不缺少　ha...
有了你　即使平凡却最重要

好光阴　纵没太多一分钟　那又如何
会与你　共同渡过　都不枉过
疯恋多　错误更多　如能从新做过
我会说　愿能为你　提前做错

谁比你重要　成功了败了也完全无重要
谁比你重要　狂风与暴雨都因你燃烧

一追再追　只想追赶生命里一分一秒
原来多么可笑　你是真正目标
一追再追　追踪一些生活最基本需要
原来早不缺少　ha... 只得你
会叫我仿佛人群里最重要

有了你　即使沉睡了　也在笑

lip
ranting

Funneee

Woot!
10 ways to get charged in the Army

From matchboxinme:

1. While on an overseas mission in a land far far away, fall asleep during guard duty. Wake up to discover that two rifles, one M203 and one SAW to be exact, are missing from the inventory list.

2. Agitate your sergeant, thereafter whack him with a chair, ala WWE. The sergeant will kick you back and viola the both of you will be in the same cell.

3. Go on a long hoilday. Do not inform your unit or anyone and keep your handphone off at all times. Do not apply for exit permit or get leave approval as well.

4. Go around bunks and steal packets of instant noodles. The best is steal it from someone of higher rank than you.

5. Have sex with an underage girl while being on AWOL.

6. Drive a SAF vehicle and ram the pillar while reversing.

7. Use vulgar language and threaten sergeant with a knife when the sergeant refuse to let you book out.

8. Assault your sergeant when asked to perform a task and when asked for the reason for assault, assault further.

9. Have "bad parents" that will blow the whistle on you when you are sleeping at home instead of reporting for training.

10. Lie to your superiors about having to visit a relative in hospital and then head on to Zouk instead.


* the above mentioned ways are tried and tested and the accused are currently serving out their sentence in our posh detention barracks

thanx to mrbrown.com for this hilarious snippet

ranting

boring day

after inundating my blog with pictures and giving it a major revamp, i realised i really have nothing better to do today.

it was utterly boring. 18 hours of pure boredom. i actually thought about going back to work. mein gott. how could that ever happen to me? sigh. seriously the most boring day of febuary thus far.

well, on wednesday i actually went to the IE forum 05. I attended W Chan Kim's presentation on Blue Ocean strategy, and wondered "why would anyone really really want to spend 1k to attend this business forum?" it was more of a marketing for his book than anything, but i finally worked my brain the economics side of things yesterday. it was a good experience, but i left after 1 lecture. how sad of me. and to come up was lenovo's CEO and Nissan's Vice President, along with Ho Kwon Ping and some guy from Bain. And i skipped everything for lunch with weng. haha i was that bored. vegetarian lunch at original sin somemore.

it struck me yesterday that you could actually have a whole meal without having meat. i had this big mushroom topped with some funny vegetable stuffing, (huge mushroom as in 12 cm diameter mushroom), and lasagna. without meat. it did taste a little weird, but the tomato sauce more that made up for it. i feel detoxified. ok enough. back to my carnivorous diet.

on a more serious note, it struck me that i was just living my life as though i had a set deadline. September 2005. when i am flying off. to wharton hopefully, if not chicago. i am going to leave the life i have in singapore, 20 years of rooted belongings, and fly off for 4 years. plus plus. it's really both sides of the coin really, whether to be happy to start life abroad, or to look back at my life in singapore and wonder if i should have chosen the path i did choose. good thing i don't have a gf at the moment, and it doesn't pay to have one at the moment because it just doesn't make sense. sigh. dilemma.

sometimes i think i am holding back. for a good reason too. but whatever it is, only time will tell if i have made the correct decision.

carpe diem indeed.


and last picture for the day: EOAC



lip
ranting

I really like the caption 

Christmas Party at Chinablack! 

Bali 2004

Bali 2004

i went to bali last year. just trying out the new photo features. trying to learn html and xml editing, as well as dreamweaver during my leave taking.

like the new look? i just updated it not too long ago.

meanwhile, playing pristontale. hopefully, this blog would be the start of my own webpage to come. my mum already has one:). go check it out at http://tia.8k.com/

also learning multimedia editing using soundforge/cakewalk and song recordings. maybe i'll put it up on my blog for comments and such. have to find a server first:)

well, comments please:)?

cya all. but before that. more pictures!



lip
ranting

Beach Bums 

Temple in the sea 

Me. Driving